It only just occurred to me today to be sort of irritated by vacuum cleaners. I mean, if you've read me for any length of time, you will know that generally I love to vacuum. And also to steam-clean the carpets. I guess I really don't like the ACT of vacuuming or steam-cleaning per se, but I am completely enamored of the results of such activities.
What I'm not so fond of is the attachments. Now, I used to live in a 200-year-old farm house. I understand that, back then, people were of smaller stature. It hasn't so much been evolution that has caused average heights and life expectancies to change so much over the last few hundred years, but better nutrition and health care. So essentially, I understood why I'd have to remind my brother to "duck" every time he came in my front door for a visit.
In such a house, one might also think that bending over the sink to brush one's teeth, at an uncomfortable 90 degree angle, would be due to the same sort of thing -- people having gotten, on average, much taller over the past 200 years or so. But then, when you stop to think about it... Did my rural VA farmhouse HAVE indoor plumbing 200 years ago? I seriously think not. Besides that, the bathroom wasn't even in the original portion of the house, it was in the addition. Which I believe came along a mere 80 years ago.
Now, a broom or a mop are not that easy to use. I sometimes wonder if it's because they were invented long, long ago, that they seem to be made at such small proportions. I wonder what Shaquille O'Neal would do, if he were forced to sweep his own floor, for instance. The only thing I can figure is, he'd have to get down on his knees to do it.
Even if these things were invented a long time ago, does that mean someone who makes them has never used them? I have to suspect this. I can almost imagine the World's foremost mop manufacturer, standing there thinking "Well, look, it's almost as tall as I am. Why make it any longer?" without even considering that you use it at an angle. I'm guessing, though, that this guy, this mop guru, is not only cheap, but short, and pre-dates the indoor plumbing in my previous home.
Things like this make me also rather cranky over the fact that sweat pants that come down to my ankles are nearly impossible to find. I have tried just about every brand and style I could find. But the ones that start out the correct length, are knickers by the time I wash them. And the ones that are 4" too long when I first owned them, are 2" above my ankles after laundering. I'm no rocket scientist, but would it really kill someone to wash the darn material first, and sew second? Can we not take just a tiny bit of the guesswork out of this whole debacle? I'll pay $5 extra, if you can keep my ankles warm!
And so, I have to wonder when I'm vacuuming the dust bunnies out from under the bed,going up and down the stairs, reaching behind the washer and dryer, or trying to get the fluff out of the vent covers up high on the wall... WHY are the vacuum hoses so darn short? You know, that hard plastic tube part that you put the attachments on... WHY do I still have to bend over to vacuum? Why, oh WHY can I not be allowed to do this in the upright position?
Is it because, when vacuum cleaners were originally designed hundreds of years ago, the average housewife was significantly shorter than 5"2" tall? I mean, I'm no giant here. I'm barely over average height for a woman in the US. So why am I stooped over using this darn thing? Is there some unforeseen danger I've failed to, well, foresee, by making that silly tube thingy just 6" longer? Is having it shorter perhaps less likely for me to put my eye out?
The paranoid in me feels that perhaps this is a conspiracy to keep those of us prone to household chores, stooped over. Keep our heads lower than that of our "masters"? Keep us in a continual state of low-level achy-ness to remind us of our lot in life? I mean, technically, even in the US, and even in our two-income households, it is still the women doing this work.
But really, it's probably not a conspiracy, and it's probably not even a financial consideration that keeps manufacturers doing such inane things with simple household necessities, like brooms, mops, vacuums, and yes, even sweatpants. The simple truth is, we probably have all sorts of people designing things they have never used once in their lives. In other words, it's sheer stupidity that keeps propagating this stupidity.
And if anyone out there wants to make me a pair of sweatpants that will still have a 32" inseam AFTER they have been washed -- message me so I can send you my address!
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